The Only Entertaining Moments of the 2012 Eagles Season


10)  Starship 7 Movie Trailer

It became so difficult to find a 10th moment of the Eagles season that was enjoyable I had to create my own.  Thanks to iMovie and YouTube I was able to make it happen.  I honestly had more fun making this movie than I did watching any of the Eagles games this season.  And the process of making this involved tediously selecting 1.5 second clips of Vick’s season.  Mike you’ll be missed.

9) Fletcher Cox Sack Celebration

Fletchercox_medium

One of the only bright spots of the Eagles season was first round pick Fletcher Cox.  For the first time in god knows how many years the Eagles selected a defensive lineman that wasn’t a “fastball.”  For the uninitiated “fastballs,” were defensive lineman around 6 feet tall and weigh around 250.  Some, such as Trent Cole worked out very well.  Others like Brandon Graham, Jerome McDougle, Mike Patterson, Daniel Teo-Nesheim, Bryan Smith, and Broderick Bunkley not as much.  And when the pixie-esque defensive lineman were paired with the sprite like linebackers the run defensive became a sieve .  Enter Cox, who stands 6′-4″ and weighs close to 300 lbs.  To the shock of few Cox was able to collapse the pocket at times and clog the running lanes in the middle.  The GIF above follows a sack against the Bengals.  Fletcher rolls some air dice, leans over to pick up his winnings and make it rain.  I like to think that Fletcher shot the moon on his roll, cause there is no better feeling when it comes to throwing bones.

8)  Riddin’ Dirty

Meet Sammy Forest Jr. a.k.a. Riddin’ Dirty.  Mr. Forest rolls through the Eagles tailgates on his Jazzy that is equipped with a karaoke machine, bottle of vodka, and a prosthetic leg painted with a Phillies logo that doubles as a tip jar.  The music selections range from Joe’s 2000 classic I Wanna Know to Chamillionaire’s anthem Ridin Dirty.  You can find him serenading Broad Street line passengers on the way to the games or under the solar panels of Lincoln Financial Field’s parking lot.  Each game you could remain confident that Sammy Forest Jr was showing up, unlike the 2012 Eagles roster.

7)  Siri announces Jim Washburn firing.

Yes it was shocking to hear that the DL coach who at one point spent three months in a half way house after pleading out on steroids charges was difficult to work with.  The 63 year Washburn reportedly referred to his boss Juan Castillo as Juanita and nurtured a me first attitude amongst the defensive lineman by spelling sacks with a $.  Washburn’s Wide Nine, or strategy used when you played Madden as a 12 year old, fell flat this season contributing to the Eagles 4-12 record.  Right now I’m still a little bitter, but give me a year and I’ll be able to laugh about the Wide Nine the same way we laugh at an 80’s fad like men’s hair mousse.

6)  Ridin Dirty Part 2 (Drop it in the leg)

Honestly the best part of any Eagles tailgate this year minus the soft pretzels.

5)  Fire Andy

I like that they call the song a hit in the title.  Also to quell any concerns, this is available on iTunes.

“I hate you Nnamdi, you like a zombie.”

“Offensive line ain’t doing ish, Andy’s fault they late round picks.  Most of them are 5’6″, they can’t block little kids.”

4)  Damaris Johnson back door cover punt return

A garbage time play during a meaningless game, but a play that meant so much to anyone gambling on the Eagles covering.  My future children are going to college thanks to Damaris.

3)  Ridin Dirty Part 3 (Call Me)

I wasn’t kidding my eyes lit up every time I saw him.

2)  Brian Dawkins Number Retirement Ceremony

Absolutely the best moment of the 2012 season.  Dawkins is more loved in Philadelphia than just about everyone not named Jerome Brown.  Dawkins presence might be why the Eagles were able to beat the Giants that week.  From the scampering out of the tunnel to the halftime speech, it was perfect.  I’m not ashamed to say a tear might have dropped at halftime.  Dawkins deserved all of the adulation he received that night.  He’s everything this 2012 Eagles team was not, tough.

1)  Ronnie Brown Fumble (The Gigli of NFL plays)

I know this is from the 2011 season but never again.  The same way we should treat fedoras, multi colored ketchup, and Limp Bizkit music.  Never ever ever ever again.  Ronnie’s decision making skills remind me of my first time playing “Kill the Cow.”  I saw people running at me, I panicked and threw the ball. The trouble is I was 8 when that happned, Ronnie was 30.

Andy, my time is yours.

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